Sunday, September 29, 2013

Grownup Children: Teaching adults

We may have made a mistake.

We allowed the brother of my partner to move in. The idea was to help him get on his feet, teach him some beginner stuff, and take advantage of an extra pair of adult hands. It hasn't exactly worked out that way.

He is defensive of the way "he has always done it", even while admitting it doesn't work. Then he asks why he should change it, cuz he's "still alive" and isn't that good enough?

He doesn't listen when I tell him how to do things... Like move everything to clean the floor when a bag of tomatoes was found rotting. He didn't. There was rotten tomato zombie juice on the floor.

Instead of helping to clean out the garage, he asks the ones cleaning to show him where stuff is to build chairs.

His common sense is almost nonexistent. His ability to prioritize needs serious work. His concept of having a better life is vague. And his refusal to change is driving me nuts.

Now, to be clear, this is not my first rodeo. I help people like this all the time. It frustrates me that I have to spend so much time getting them to understand the need to grow and change. But this is a whole new level.

I have never met someone so self-deluded, and yes, so broken. I have my work cut out for me. I'm just not sure I'm willing to pay the price for teaching this time.

Have you ever been in this situation? Share your story in the comments section.