There are two ways to approach having children: a) they will fit into
your pre-existing life, and b) your life does a 180, loop-the-loop,
barrel roll, screetching halt, speedy reverse with drifting...
Anyone who thinks that they can go with A is in for a shock. It just doesn't work that way.
Children
are like bank robbers who get trapped with the bank CEO, surrounded by
SWAT. They are desperate to get their own way and somewhat delusional
that they might actually do so. Any negotiation with the hostage takers
will only result in encouraging their behavior. DO NOT NEGOTIATE. They
will NOT release your life to it's previous existence.
For
pagans, this is even more so the case. We used to go to ritual, engage
in various activities for achieving altered states, some form of "free
lovin", a little bit of nudity, playing with fire and bladed weapons,
staying up all night, dancing around fires...
Now?
Supper is at 6, pj's and books at 7, and bedtime is 8, and the goddess
split the skull of anyone who dares to disturb that most sacred of
rituals.
Where solstice used to be a revelry of
unprecedented Bacchanalia, it now consists of barely getting the kids
outside before the sun sets (cuz you disrupted the sacred ritual,
silly!), trying to light a fire in the firepit with wet firewood (cuz
it's been raining for a week and you were just happy that all the family
was indoors - forget worrying about the wood!), while using free limbs
(arms, legs, head) to keep the kids from sticking their "helpful"
fingers into the flames, then trying to make up a story about the sun on
the spot (cuz you certainly haven't had any time to PREPARE) and having
it interrupted every 30 seconds by questions you may or may not know
the answer to until you don't know which way is up.
But
it's all worth it because every family member joined in waving goodbye
to the setting sun and that seems far more spiritual than turning in a
circle to address each of the cardinal directions.
Happy Solstice (late, of course)!!
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